Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem or Ripley vs. Dutch?

Alien vs Predator RequiemWe’re sure the Angry Video Game Nerd will have something to say about the name of the newest installment of the Alien and Predator sagas. In good time, we’re certain AVGN will come up with a reason why they pluralized the title, as they did in the second film of the Alien series.

We have our own issues…

We’d like to discuss two problems with this addition to the series. First, the alternate reality that must be justified, wherein Aliens have made a public appearance on Earth, and thus, cannot be “discovered” in the 1979 film Alien. Second, the needless matching of Aliens and Predators, when the true contest is between a muscle-bound Austrian commando and a vengeful, female space pilot.

Time Continuum

Aliens land in Colorado, attack and spawn and are taken out (presumably) by one Predator. Super duper. But if that happens in the present day on Earth, shouldn’t the military already know about xenomorphs by the time Ripley’s space freighter cruises past LV-426? Perhaps we could justify all this, and tell ourselves that The Company knew just what was on the planet and were sending the crew of the Nostromo down to pick up a live sample.

Still, you’d think an outbreak in the U.S. would get plenty of news coverage, and there would be an historical record of the events and the creature. We suppose we’ll actually need to watch AVP: R to find out the answer to that question.

Of course, we realize that we’re supposed to dismiss all of this. Just as we might dismiss the concept of Superman & Batman vs. Alien & Predator, because, boy, wrapping your head around that whole mess, with a view for reality, could give you an aneurysm.

The real problem with the Alien vs. Predator series—a problem that has been inherent since Dark Horse published the first comic book—is that the film fails to recognize the two true adversaries whose skills should be tested in mortal combat.

Ripley vs. Dutch

Yes, why not a film where Major Alan “Dutch” Schaefer and Lieutenant Ellen L. Ripley battle to the death? It makes perfect sense. Ripley battles Alien and wins. Dutch battles Predator and wins. The next matchup should be Ripley vs. Dutch.

Even Lieutenant Mike Harrigan (Danny Glover’s character in Predator 2) would be a decent contender. Of course, we wouldn’t send him into the ring with Ripley. There’d be no surprises there. But maybe he could fight the torso of Bishop or something. We wouldn’t watch that, but still, these are victors! Victors move on to the next round, not losers.

Whatcha think?

Would you see Ripley vs. Dutch over AVP: Requiem?